Today I am going to help you have some tools to explore YOUR life. I want you to be have these tools so that if you choose to, you can make some positive changes.
If we are truly to connect mind with body, then like when we train our physical state by "working out" to improve our health, then we need to sometimes make "program changes" with our mental state to improve our health too.
I will share with you some personal experiences that may resonate with you and if they do then don't hesitate to ask me questions about how it's going because "creating personal change" like the hair commercial on TV says "doesn't happen overnight but it will happen".
I have met some really interesting people in my last six months. A lot of them had similar "success" aspects to their lives which others envied or emulated in the desire to be like them.
Some were successful in business, some were successful in entertainment, some were successful in health, some were successful in sport and some were successful in relationships but all however shared the lack of connection in their own lives.
Often these "successful" people had a desire "to slow down and be present" in their lives but didn't know how to be.
I spoke with many of them personally and while they always were in a hurry it appeared as though they were on a "treadmill". They were often busy being busy.
Now I have in the past been accused or observed doing this and when it was pointed out to me I would say "no I'm not, I am just totally focussed on achieving my goals". And then I would continue to do what I had always done. You don't need me to finish that little statement to know the next part.
So, what was the deciding factor in me changing that path or course of those actions. Well in all honesty it was realizing that I was doing it, and to not, want to try to slow down but to actually stop.
Think of it this way.
Try standing in front of a runaway train and holding up your hands to stop it and expecting a positive result and most likely the outcome will be the opposite. That is how some of "us" busy people exist in our everyday lives. As long as we have the "next" phase of plan outlined in front of us then we just keep rolling along the track, moving from one station to the next.
One year ago I decided to make a commitment to myself to find balance in my life instead of just "work, work, work". In essence I needed to change a pattern, break a habit or recognize a trigger point and act upon that.
I have always been healthy. My desire is to show others how to achieve that same goal for themselves but someone much smarter than me once said "you can't help all of the people, all of the time". They need to be part of the process of change. They must want to be part of that change cycle. YOU get to choose when that time is right for you.
For me, it came when I looked at my diary and saw that I was "very busy all of the time" and that I could always find something to add in there to fill the gaps of spare time productively. I even had a little mantra to stop me getting bored whcih went "if in doubt, then workout". Was I worried that if I slowed down I might stop ? Who knows the answer to that but I had to change.
One of my LIFE goals I wanted was that I desired someone in my life to share the "successes" with. When I was honest it would have been hard to let them in. Now was that because I hadn't found the right person ? Possibly, but even so when I do find her, how would I make space for her to share ?
Looking inwards at ourselves is difficult (and can be painful). In life you often see the successes but when look inwards you also see the failures. Those elements of yourself that haven't gone the way you wanted. Is this bad, I don't think so. It is part of who you are now and the past definitely plays a role in that.
All too often we introduce ourselves to others almost like we are a blank slate so that they don't see our past failures. This really is in fact a false perception we are giving. Who hasn't been in a relationship, friendship, business arrangement or similar and felt like the other person was changing or had an alter ego. If we see that in others then surely it makes sense that others see that in us too. No one is perfect, so why do we try to present that way.
It will most likely lead to some form of disappointment when "the real you" surfaces and that often results in pain for both parties. Imagine your life is like walking along a sandy beach and leaving a trail of foot prints (think of that famous series of pictures). Is our goal to show people that our beach is perfect ? Or is reality that you have some deeper prints here and there where your life has had meaning. Don't try to wash away or wipe off the past but celebrate it by living in the present and learning from good and bad experiences you have encountered.
Life is for living !
My personal strategy seeemed simple on paper.
I gave myself eight (8) weeks of doing Yoga as my workout regime and to be open to all that it offered both physically and mentally (spiritually it seemed to be a positive). Now I have been involved in the fitness industry for 20 years and had tried Yoga in the past and hadn't found it able to give me that energy charged, blood pumping, sweat filled workout I believed I sought.
Guess that my own self diagnosis of "being A.D.D. before it was trendy could have been correct" :-)
However, this time it did.
Was it that I was open to the experience ?
Was it that I was committing to making changes in my life ?
Whatever the final answers are I am not sure of all those answers - YET. However, it is still happening, because LIFE changing sequences are best repeated often to form a life changing habit. I have been doing Yoga for a year now and feel good. Is it my only form of exercise, no, but it helps to clean the cobwebs out of the attic.
My clarity for getting a better sense of who I am is stronger. Do I always like myself, no, but if I don't like what I see I get to act positively to change it.
Have I found my girlfriend yet, no, but at least when I do there will be room to share that space with. So am I looking for my other half, no, why would I only want half a person. I am out there living my life and hope to meet the other "whole person" to compliment my life.
I hope you all find out that the person we often seek is probably the person you are inside right now. Give yourself some positive credit and allow your open heart to shine and like a moth to a flame hopefully you will attract that other "whole person".
Namaste'
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